Confined Wisdom

> When Sholay Met Facebook | Gabbar and the goons.

> The Problem with Closeted Friends | Those times when your gay friend pretends to be straight and you play along…

> The Fourth Meal | Why must insomniacs be outcasts?

> New Bros | Once you grow up, finding new friends is harder than it seems.

> What’s in a name? | Scar was called Scar, and he had a scar.

> Lurking at a lingerie store: An intimate tale | Just hangin’ out, touching bras.

> The Monkey and the Grape: A (Sad but) True Story | Without the Yang, the Yin ain’t Yin.

> I hate you. Please love me. | I’m a bit of a sociopath, but don’t let that get in the way of our hug.

> Of testy times | Truth be told, getting hit in the balls is funny.

> How to lose a guy in one wedding | Guys can get so girly sometimes.

> Best. Roadtrip. Ever. | A fart tale of epic proportions…

> I am Pakistan | …and I am flawed.

> A Day in Reverse [VIDEO] | Playing with reverse frame video.

> Tequila or not Tequila | I fucking hate/love shots.

> All hail the Asshole | You can’t live without ‘em.

> Meddle, and ye shall repent | That time I lost cable.

> The Facebook World War | Epic awesomeness in the form of geo-puns.

> The Annual Summer Fanboy Geekfest | Don’t spoil my movies, geeks.

> Reimagined: A Minimalist Movie Art Project | This is how I see these movies…

> Facebook Fiends (Part 2) | Who else do you hate on Facebook?

> Loom Service | Sex now rings the doorbell.

> Facebook Fiends (Part 1) | Who do you hate on Facebook?

> Be mighty, Emos. | Use the force, Luke…

> How to cure a Qalaqand deficiency | A Harold & Kumar story. Only true.

> But I still just hate McDonald’s | And not because it’s unhealthy.

> The Sexicons | Because I hate emoticons.

> The Nameless Comrades | Those people I’ve worked with.

> Of Afreekans, Yourpians and Filastinis | My dad taught me racism. What did your dad teach you?

> The girl with the Shavani | And I thought she was kinky Islamist.

> Sixteen year old-me screwed future-me forever | When I was a little boy, I wanted a larger willy.

> Cougars and Sugar Daddies Rejoice | The older you are, the sweeter you’d get.

> Send an annoying email. Or two. Or seventeen. | Step-by step email acknowledgment. Now that’s etiquette.

> A city full of manginas | Where are all the dudes?

> This too shall pass | Smooth Talk Bob set me straight.

> Fuck Facebook, sometimes. Really. | Why am I suddenly looking stupid?

> Born a piglet | Who grows up to become a cop?

> Cross-pollination, is it? | My parents messed me up. Big time.

> The Biryani that hissed at me | It’s just weird when you can hear your food.

> Stoned movie review | When Hugh Grant was a librarian?!

> 2012: Be prepared | Remember the warnings…

> Everyone has a story to tell | When my cabbie went to Karachi.

> Bapu! | The real “Mahatma” Gandhi.

> Am I indirectly blowing this dude? | The street food in Karachi.

> When Grown Ups Go Online | Are your parents on Facebook?

> The Heartbreak Kids | My on-off love affair with the Pakistan cricket team.

> Father Terrorist: A Christmas Story | So this is where it all started…

> A little Imation goes a long way | How to use piracy and receive “thank you’s” this Christmas

> Tiny Tony | I once was a tiger cub.

> You’re a nobody and it’s Christmas | How to get through the holidays with your annoyingly curious family.

> A belated letter to Mr. Bates | That masturbating bastard!

> Dark side of the Nun | The real Mother Teresa.

> Kush it! | A revolutionary product for healthy breasts!

> I thought this was… | When I mixed up my celebrities.

> Coleslaw is totally like sex | Why you shouldn’t remain “just friends” with your ex.

> Know your chatroom acronyms | ROFLMAO and other lies we tell.

> Who doesn’t love adulterated food? | Fusion menus are the best!

> The 3 types of Pakistani beggars | They’re here in Dubai!

> It’s happening in 2011, not 2012 | The Mayans got it wrong.

> Those Mediterranean Douchebags | Those Latin bastards score the most.

> 14th August | Non-tragedies on that fateful day.

> My cleverness is being wasted on imbeciles | Movie pop culture is so dead.

> Don’t max out your God credit | You have to pay Him back, eventually.

> Vegetarianism vs. iPod | I’m a slave to technology.

> I love smashing stuff | The original fetish.

> A new breed of gay | Nut huggers are so last season.

> 5 killer tips to safe ogling | How to do it smoothly.

> Why I will never fly | My dream of living The Jetsons is in tatters.

> Is Amna Haq a psychopathic Twitter-slut? | I’m being watched by a supermodel. Or am I?

> How Facebook put our vanities into overdrive | Digital photographs just aren’t as much fun.

> Five tips to surviving the recession job cuts | How I weathered the storm.

> Use the Metro or suffer: an RTA conspiracy | Why the traffic is screwing us.

> FarmKill 1.0: A FarmVille Upgrade for Real People | What should be there instead.

> Conversations with Yoda: Dragonfly Spa | Yoda is everywhere.

> My quick vacation at FarmVille | And why I hated it.

> Crushing the Pakistani dream: An unlikely Blackcap adventure | Kiwis beat Pakistan to reach the finals – Champions Trophy 2009.

> Reflect0p0rn | Hidden exhibitionists on eBay.

> Facebook Vs. Twitter: Whose offices look better? | Take a look at these totally hot office spaces.

> Who doesn’t know Michael Jackson? | A stupid Facebook feed.

> WTF are people Googl-ing? | Strange Google search suggestions.

> The Islamic BJ | Islam gives BJs the thumbs up: Try telling that to your wife/wives.

> Barack Obama’s consistent smile | Looks like a cut and paste job, but isn’t.

> The right to chew | Selective Sound Sensitivity Syndrome (4S) explained.

> Why you’ll always be overpaid | Do you really work your money’s worth?

> 5 things you can’t accept about your parents | They’re human after all.

> Eating with hands: Uncivilized or traditional? | Demonstration: How to eat with your hands, desi style.

> I watched: District 9 | And it totally rules.

> The Essential Eighties | List of top picks of 80s singles

> The need for an educational re-farm: The Pakistan Education Crisis | Literacy rates in Pakistan need to be given a serious look.

> Dubai B00b City | So, they wanted to open a Hooters here?

> Change of fruit | From Apple to BlackBerry.

> Dubai Metro | The first day.

> Infused Patriotism | My dad totally “Pakistanized” me.

> 5 films that almost got me killed | Why I grew up thinking I was invincible.

> In all fairness | The desi obsession with fair skin.

> People whose names begin with letters whose phonetic sound begins with a consonant… and other such miseries | The names people say.

> Facebooked! | Tracy suffers a major online blunder.

> The Invigorator of the Soul | A Rooh Afza story.

> The Patrons of Dysfunction | Why Pakistan is innately dysfunctional.

> The Ultimate Doggie Treat | A cure for dry-humping doggies.

> The really shady slim | When viral marketing goes too far.

> Playthings from Hell | Totally disturbing toys.

> 15 ways to lose your masculinity. And then some. | Stuff guys should never do.

> Daftwas | The craziest fatwas you’ll ever hear about.

> Baby tossing: Is it really as horrific as the West makes it sound? | The Indian cult that’s throwing baby’s off mosque ceilings.

> Conversations with Yoda: Citibank | Yoda is everywhere.

> Shift Perspective | The women of Pakistan.

> The “Baara” (12) Commandments | Co-worker chronicles: Vegetarianism.

> RAS Syndrome | What’s in an acronym?.

> The Obsession with Voyeur | Everyone’s watching Rakhi Sawant’s Swayamvar.

> Conversations with Yoda: Burger King | Yoda is everywhere.

> Forum Pakistan, With Love | Is this the true Pakistan/India hatred?

> Is moderate Islam even an option?| Can religion take superlatives?

> The Whodunnit/Howdunnit Conundrum | Who killed Benazir?

> The chicken or the egg | The Facebook clone.

> Paisa Vasool | Make your Bollywood movie pay you back.

> Vhy me? | Co-worker chronicles: Swapping the “V” with the “W”.

> Annie, are you okay? | A strange Michael Jackson account.

> The rise of the bitch | How the term “bitch” has evolved through the ages.